Appropriate Resolutions for life’s relationships.

Text Box: 				Experience is that marvellous thing 
    that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.     - F. P. JONES 

     Did you ever think when you started a conversation, that your relationship with the person you’ve targeted MIGHT be affected … for a very long time? Know this reality and respond to it:  


1)  Decide if you care about the relationship you want with the person.


2)  Clarify, and repeat as necessary, about how much you care about the relationship, and about them, when trying to resolve differences.


3) Make sure your actions (and your words) match your ‘caring’.


      If you don’t care, it will come across in your words, body language, or vocal style; if you do care, and they receive the message that the relationship is important to you, you’ve passed the first potential ‘speed-bump’. The ‘caring’ about ‘relationship’ will create a positive platform on which to build.


4) Be clear by telling the other if the relationship is important, in specific terms. In a work environment, telling another person that you want to work with them ‘collaboratively’ will take you closer to that reality; and the relationship will continue to evolve in a positive direction as long as you continue to ‘walk the talk’. And don't be afraid to explore what each of you means, specifically, when you say "collaborating". Words often mean differing things to different people so ensure that everybody is on the same page.


5) Never assume that s/he knows how feel about the relationship; the more escalated the differences between you, the more important it is for those involved to confirm that the relationships at stake are important regardless of what those relationships entail or the environment in which the relationships need to be maintained.

Changing The Culture of Conflict:

Our present challenge is to change the culture of conflict itself within our families, our workplace, our communities, and our world.

It is to create a culture where even the most serious disputes are handled on the basis not of force and coercion but of mutual interest and coexistence.

Far from eliminating differences, our challenge is to make the world safe for differences.

William Ury, 1999: Getting To Peace; Transforming Conflict At Home, At Work And In The World; Penguin Putnam Inc., 1999

Website table of contents  and Joseph Ravick …  links to what’s on this site and who I am.

ABOUT Conflict...  What conflicts look like…

DisputesWHAT DO DISPUTES LOOK LIKE,  and how do people react or respond when conflicts escalate into disputes? (the many faces of conflict),.

COMMUNICATION & CONFLICT  Definitions, terms, jargon

CONFLICT RESOLUTION TIPS AND GUIDELINES: Strategies and behaviours for you to apply when in conflict.

CONFLICT CHRONICLES: Original stories by Joseph Ravick with a common theme. The chronicles feature real-life conflicts describing the people, their relationships, and the outcomes which they experienced whether they liked it or not.