Appropriate Resolutions for life’s relationships.

For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance; 

A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace.                                                       - ECCLESIASTES 3:1-8

Bill's Options: To continue the battle of wills, doing things as before, probably without any change to previous outcomes, or worse. Bill could also step back, then make his attempts to communicate and relate as meaningful and important as was his love for Trevor.




Bill's decisions, his choices: To break the historical patterns of escalation. To practice self-management techniques  like rehearsing what he wanted and needed to say. To set an environment which supported collaboration on the issues by NOT allowing himself to become tired, and stressed to a point where he 'attacked' Trevor. Ultimately, Bill decided that he and Trevor needed to have a relatively stress-less, functional and interactive discussion about what was really important to both of them and to the family.




An alternative outcome, realized: Bill and Trevor made an appointment to meet, to talk at a time and place comfortable for both. Once they got by the tense start-up phase, they spent a lot of time on the important issues, skipping the ego-related details which had created the divide between them. The bottom line; Bill and Trevor grew from the experience. They continued to disagree on many things, but very differently with little escalating. Their relationship benefited from the changes and even the disagreements were reduced; acceptance had become a norm. Trevor’s “Don’t sweat the small stuff!” now resonated for both. They also signed up together for a communication and conflict workshop for teens and parents at the local community centre. All good!


So what did you come up with and did we miss anything?

Text Box: “LET'S MAKE A D*E*A*L*….” continued.

Website table of contents  and Joseph Ravick …  links to what’s on this site and who I am.

ABOUT Conflict...  What conflicts look like…

DisputesWHAT DO DISPUTES LOOK LIKE,  and how do people react or respond when conflicts escalate into disputes? (the many faces of conflict),.

COMMUNICATION & CONFLICT  Definitions, terms, jargon

CONFLICT RESOLUTION TIPS AND GUIDELINES: Strategies and behaviours for you to apply when in conflict.

CONFLICT CHRONICLES: Original stories by Joseph Ravick with a common theme. The chronicles feature real-life conflicts describing the people, their relationships, and the outcomes which they experienced whether they liked it or not.